lost friendship FOUND!

gosh.. the rain jus keeps pouring and pouring for the whole day!
so i decided stay home and snuggle up in bed and jus enjoy the weather!
i was so bored at home though.. so i decided to heed mellie's advice and pack the room.. but i ended up spendin the whole afternoon packing the whole HSE. gosh it tiring.. but now my hse is so clean n the floors are sparkling.. hahahhaa



ANYWAY...
today i started to think of the friendships that i lost due to misunderstandings and in a little sense childishness was at play too. particularly one that meant alot to me when i was young and the hurt i went thru den.. the "grudge" lasted for so many years. until yesterday...
we met up .. jus the both of us. and we hit it off well.. we didn mention alot of the past but we both noe that its all in the past. there was a tinge of awkwardness but i am sure over time it will all subside. i remeber how jus recently when i mention how uncomfortable i feel being with her. how much i dont like her all cos i noe i am still hurt from the past. i feel very much for this friendship cos it did brought me so much pain. until now .. i manage to let go of the anger and hurt. I will embrace the friendship afresh. it takes both hands to clap so i hope she feels the same way too. i am very happy that we are able to have heart to heart talks now. and we can laugh at how stoopid we were in the past. Thankew for letting me open my heart again and not be so narrow-minded and stuck in my own world. i was foolish and wrong.

Pple say frienships come and go.. but i dont believe so. Friends might grow distant once awhile but they are there. so dont eva hold back and mistaken that u have lost the friendship. you only lose by holding back. True friends are here to stay and they do leave footprints in ur heart.

:: i feel nostalgic ::

the extremes in life

Me jus came back from my Uncle's James Wedding over the weekend!
it was was SO SO SO SO SO SO SO much FUN! i neva had so much fun with my family in such a long time. tink the last time was CNY. heehee.. how i miss our family gatherings... it ended all so soon..
we all hardly slept everynite .. we all put our heart and soul in preparing for his BIG day. frm the food to the deco to the songs....
on the very big day!! all went out of control. i was in charge of the seatings and me n my few Cuzzies were in charge of the liquor. that is to make sure everyone is drinking up! hahahhaa.. there was a table of uncles that went high cos of me.. hahaha.. everyone was at singing at the top of their voices and dancing on the stage!
i could see that my uncle was very very happy. so was my grandma n grandpa. I LURVE MY BIG HAPPY FAMILY TO BITS!

here are some of the many photos we took!

the arrival of the bride and groom!

my family and the newly weds!

me and the flower gers... and yes. i had a yellow flower ard my wrist. i had no choice!

me n my fave baby cousin..

well .. he is not exactly a baby anymore. but he will always be my baby!

me n kor had a very good time at BREWERKZ!
the ambience was good.. the food was good .. the company was good.
the beer was not my cup of tea though.. haahaa

i look so fair beside him..hahhahaha

our silly faces..

me and my golden ale...

thanks kor for the wonderful dinner!!

oh yea.. me n melsie finally bought mellie her pressie and here is the opening ceremony being filmed..

:: i feel chirpy ::

a lazy monday

my 2 favourite mels pang seh me today.. so me off to find my harold. since i will be away for the weekend so i shall spent more time with him.

den me went for a little shopping on my own.. it feels so good to shop urself. u dnt haf to listen to a 2nd opinion u jus get wat u want.. hhaha.. but i tend to over spent when i am by myself more. if onli i had mellie with me today. she will try and stop me from spending .. den again.. she MIGHT NOT!

tmr i am gng to BREWERKZ!!!! yippee.. i cant wait man.. reservations at 730pm! will post photos tmr !

:: i feel excited ::

its a sunny day again

me cld hardly wake up today as i had onli barely 4hrs of slp.
me dragged my feet to work and thank GOD i was not late. heehee
slowly.. me am all perked up cos sales is good today! realy good.. hahaha..
huisy will gurantee hit her target this month. haven felt so good for mths cos me have hit my target for mths! hahahahaha.. i jus wana go celebrate!
so me pampered myself with a new pair of earrings.. white roses. to reward myself..
also bought stuff for sibs to share with them my joy.

me took photos with the vainpots at esteee lauder!!

me n belle at lunch!

me and belle at the counter!

me and belle again .. acting cute

yes.. us again..

presenting.. AGNES! the siao char bo..

yesterday i met nainai after sch! we went to have korean food for dinner. we were famished by the time we met..

my nainai...

our feast... yummilicious

our satisfied faces...

:: i feel happy ::

its times like this u wish u could cry your eyes out and all is over.
you feel fustrated but you are not sure wat u want.
i keep convincing myself that nothing is bothering me and that i am happy with life.
but now.. i feel alone and i cant say why.
there are so much things to consider and the many things u have to face in reality. it scares me . realy..
the expectations u have to live up to everyday. the disappointments u experience now and then.
the loneliness that u have to put up with. the amount of courage you have summon.

i dont wana fall apart. i know by tmr i will be my normal self again.

:: i feel neglected ::

its late alr and i shld be in bed.. hahaha
but tmr is my 1st official day back in sch.. a part of me feels excited and the other part.. reluctant.
life is full of contradictions isnt it..
its gonna be a long day tmr.. 12 -6 all the way without any breaks.
me am looking forward to meet my mels..

:: i feel sleepy ::

awaken by a panic alarm

we cldn bid yet again for our blardy modules.... sch has alr officially started we are not settled down yet. this system is CRAZY.

aside from that...
I GOT A NEW PHONE! Nokia n72........... IN PRETTY PINK!

isnt it gorgeous?? i LURVE IT!

me tooked so many photos with it... i took of myself and my new hairdo!

i edit it using my phone. its so FUN!

the front view..

the back view...

:: i feel satisfied ::

the selfishness in man

its always those closest to you that always take u for granted.
cos they know.. no matter wat happens u will be there.
so they dont realy apreciate it when you do things out of love for them(even if they do they will neva say it)
they will onli complain abt how selfish u have been for wantin stuff your way or excluding them in ur life. they will onli voice out and pin point the bad things u have done neva the good ones. sometimes, they say it jus to hurt ur feelings. Y must u do that to the person u love? Cant u tell me off in a less harsh manner cos i am whom u claim to love.
is it that hard to look pass the flaws and be more appreciative abt that person.
i am toking abt all types of relationships here. blood ties, love r/s, friendships. Commit the biggest mistake.. they will remember it for life and mention it everytime they are not happy with you.
You feel so betrayed at that moment. You wonder where are they when u need them. Do they realy noe how u feel. all that i have done.. is it not good enuff for them? Is this wat i get for not being able to be completely honest with them for how i feel. Dont they feel how much they mean to me.
From that it leads to... mayb it better you care less. Den u wont be so hurt. For me, its time to learn to care less and not let such unhappiness (be it big or small) bother me that much. It may seem heartless.. But it seems like this cycle is what i have to go thru and if i continue to let such things bother me so much. i will be a terribly depressed person.
its time to harden ur heart huisy .. its abt time..
its time to think less hence worry less..
its time to be more logical and less emotional..
its time to be ignorant to pple's comment and jus be true to urself.
its time to stop struggling and move on

::i feel mixed feelings::

the cors system is super fucked up

we bid and we bid...
1st time mellie didn get the module .. den we bid again. this time .. i didn get the blardy module.
the whole bidding thing is SO gettin on my nerves. it makes us all so worried and all .. we cnt even go for yoga in peace..
its worse den investing in stocks.. we keep monitoring the bidding points.. and so sure we are gonna get it.. but DAMN..
the system failed us.. it deceptive and it annoying the HELL out of me! now we haf to bid again.. and we beta get it this time! of i will burn NUS down.

:: i feel freaking PISSED ::

the durian craze

yesterday was the start of the whole durian saga!!

me n mellie went for COMBAT yoga!! whoo.. it was super FUN la.. we were realy worked out..
after that we were suppose to head to glow cafe for a heathly lunch..

Glow Juice Bar and Cafe. The salads are amazing..

its on the 2Nd floor at Hilton Hotel in case u all wana try it.

HOWEVER... me n mellie was too famished and needed "FOOD" food.. we were in the mood for "cut cut" food (that was exactly wat came to our find seriously). Therefore we headed straight to BigO at wheellock.

We were happily seated and cnt wait to order.. We were deciding between Roasted Farm Chicken and Roasted Chicken Ravioli. since the latter had a chef recommendation so decided to go for it together with Calamari.

THe calamari was not too bad. the tartar sauce is yummy. DEN came our Ravioli...

it is HORRIBLE!! not satisfying out taste buds at all!! prolly cos me n mel was so not in the pasta mood.

there is where i stopped.. i cldn eat it anymore..

BUT .. there was something that turn the table over and satisfied us ..

THE SPIKE "D" CUP! chocolate on the outside . durian on the inside.
totally caught us by surprised. absolutely FABULOUS!

we met melsie n rach to bitch at starbucks for awhile and headed to substance to find Misa!

frm left: Misa, Rach, Melsie, Moi, Mellie

so me n mellie continued the durian craze today... after yoga. we headed to Goodwood Park hotel for some durian puffs.. yum yum.

we are so gonna conquer all the durian pastries in SG!

our next stop wld be the durian buffet there next week! will gif my review on it by that time.

::i feel the durian fever::

mellie saved the day..

i forgot to add how mellie saved my eye today..

after lunch.. me felt something was in my eye.. and i cant see properly.. i got harold to help me see.. but MAN.. since when they notice small details rite. obviously he told me there is nothing ..
so i had an irritated eye all the way till mellie met me!

SHE HAD very sharp eyes now! after the op mayb.. THANK GOD! she saw a very long piece of fine fabric in my eye! so we tried to fish it out.. we drop eye drops.. and even thought of gng to the optician for help. we were struggling and fighting wif the blardy fabric for so long! my eyes were all bloodshot! hahahaha...
finally .. its came out! it was at least 5 -7 cm long or even longer.. TAMADE..
that the thing abt having big eyes.. ahhahhaa.. more surface area to trap dust.. hahahaha

thankew mellie darl. u saved my eye!

bitter sweet day

me was rushing out of the hse to meet mellie in the morning.... i was late and she was not in a very good mood. BUT of cos after seeing me .. she cnt bear to be angry wif me liao. ahhahaha
we had breakfast at coffeebean.. it was yummy!! and we discussed on our big plan to celebrate me n the 2 mels bday together! hahahaha.. jus the 3 of us!

den me headed to suntec to meet harold for a movie.. guess wat we watched!




it definitely not something huisy like to watch.. but somehow.. i was jus curious wat this show was all abt... it was okie.. not too bad..
after harold headed for work.. me met mellie again for ben and jerry's ! we had.. DUBLIN MUDSLIDE! i highly recommend this!! it was jus heavenly..
speaking of which..
huisy has been having an eating disorder lately.. i jus keep eating .. and not jus that.. i EAT ALOT!! realy like triple wat i use to eat.. it so scary!! eeks.. this is freaking me out!
i need to control my diet man.. and bcos of this .. i cant stop gng for yoga cos i scared i will put on weight!

the day when smoothly TILL.......................................
i wanted to skip the cab.. save the money n take a bus back.. little do i noe.. it gave me hell..
the blardy bus driver.. jus suddenly JAMMED the brakes and i fell!!! FUCK.
nvm. huisy was calm and quicky got back her poised.
DEN... this stoopid MAN standing behind me jus suddenly lost balance and fell backwards on ME! he stepped on my toe was was pressing me against the chair ... he is fucking heavy can.. i was in so MUCH PAIN! GODAMMIT!
i WAS SO SO SO SO SO SO PISSED. i HAD to gif him the face and the pissed off sound.

it was that very moment.. HUISY MADE A VOW! i will neva take the bus during PEAK hrs or when it is crowded.. i tell u.. huisy has something very much against public transport n MRT! i hate it .. HATE it so so much. I shall not delay getting my driving licence. neva will i tolerate buses n mrt anymore.. enuff is enuff..

luckily for me.. mummy brought me to eat some gelare icecream n mushroom pasta that was delicious and totally cheered me up! or else i will still be sore abt wat happen on the bus.

:: i feel full::

continued.........

mau mau totally carried away by her song....

its terrible mau mau!! stop!!

maureen so touched by me.. i sang jus for her.. hahaha

the tibits is good too! yummilicious...

i am so glad my baby came n join me after work. mucks..

we had a very very small tiff but we made up! seein him jus lights up my face. Thankew mau mau .. serene and harold for keeping me company yesterday! LOVE YA ALL!

:: i feel better ::

life aint bad

me met mau mau n serene for dinner yesterday!! haven seen mau mau for 3 whole mths.. she sure got alot of story to tell one. sure enuff.... she filled me n serene in. i thot i needed something to perk myself up and kick myself out of the gloomy mode.. so me convinced the both of them to wait for me to finish yoga and we go KTV!! they are my bestest buds!!! they kept me company when i realy need someone. heehee.. i am all smiles to noe that alr!
yoga was shiok.... the instuctor "cracked" my spine from top to bottom... it jus like releases tension. haahaaahaa.. after that we HIT THE KARAOKE BOX!!
so fun!!

here come the candid photos...

we are so gonna sing our lungs out!!

gng nuts..

they are my most loved frens... that made my day

serene is scared of the flash.. thats y her eyes are always so small.

mau's own rendition of zhou jie lun needs alot of work.

will break here as me need to head for lunch....

to be continued..........

all mouldy

i am so so so so so so so so so freakin bored!!!!!
i shld be happy that i am no longer working full time at estee.. but but but
i kinda miss working.. its onli the 1st day and i feel so aimless and i have practically nothing to do.
i am jus rotting the days away.. yikes! this is killing me...
i cant go out to shop cos i am broke. i cant step out of the hse cos i am broke. wat am i to do?!?!
*sigh*
weird isnt it.. jus a few days i am complainin i am tired of work n now i am missing it..
melsie is still workin.. so she cant pei me.. melody is having a hell of a time in hokkaido. jus tok to her. she is have so much fun there! and she actually went for the Hot spring NUDE!
hahahahha.. she is changed woman there man.

at the rate i am gng .. i am gonna fall into depression.. duno y but being aimless wif nothing to do is not doin me any good. i feel as though life is meaningless with nothing to look forward to. i dont even know wat i want at this point in time. i feel like giving up everything i have and start over again but i noe its not possible.. y do i feel so helpless... y must i be in such a situation. shld i pile my days with work again? or shld i try n find things to do to occupy myself.. DAMN

:: i feel helpless ::